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There are some really amazing women in the world. The fact that this thought often crosses my mind when I watch crime dramas and hear about women who have been victimized by men’s crimes and learn about the hardships they have endured raising children, not working, keeping friends and parents happy and protected from information that could upset or endanger them is so absurd that I will stop being angry so that it can end well for me.
Instead, let’s look at another name to add to the list of amazing women, who were brought back to society by the bad behavior of the man they knew. The third part Netflix series Should I Marry a Murderer? tells the story of medical technician Caroline Muirhead who, at the age of 29, falls in love with a Scottish farmer she meets on Tinder. Her name is Sandy McKellar.
He is on the verge of breaking out of a bad relationship and Sandy seems like a sanctuary, even when he is “dark” after drinking too much, and his twin Robert warns him at a party that his brother is “not right in the head”. He is open, loving, he loves her ebullience, he loves her. He proposed to her after a whirlwind courtship and she accepted. Her parents and friends are silent in their excitement, but, as Caroline remembers thinking at the time, “What’s the worst that could happen?” Which may have been the moment when the sleeping giant of Netflix’s crime scene began to stir and start to wake up.
After announcing their engagement, Sandy pleaded guilty to a hit-and-run accident in her car three years agokilling a cyclist named Tony Parsons. He and his passenger, Robert, then put the body in the bogie where Sandy worked and didn’t tell anyone. Caroline goes to the police. He asks him to try to find where the body is, otherwise he will not find it in the main place. He does so, marking it with a can of Red Bull. He keeps his appearance to give the police time to search and identify the body. The police promise him that his secret as a key witness will not be known. The body is discovered, the twins are arrested and Caroline is told to go through with them.
But when they do that, they will realize that he is the one who betrayed them. So he continues the relationship, he is very scared which leads him to drink and take drugs and in the end he comes close to breaking up. But he continues to tell the police new things, including the revelation that Parsons was not killed. The twins left him hiding on the side of the road to get weapons and a change of clothes and when they returned he was dead. Then they moved him and buried him.
Again, he feels that he cannot leave safely. He lives with Sandy, gathering more evidence for the police – recording relevant conversations and putting himself in grave danger at every turn.
Do the police appreciate it? Do they protect him with all the means they can, including what they have legally? Do they give him or his parents extra protection when asked? No. What happens later when he asks for help, realizes that he is becoming dependent on alcohol and drugs, and loses his grip on reality? No. And when he goes in to arrest the men again, does the detective – unaware that Caroline is still living with Sandy – make sure not to shout “What, Caroline? You’re our witness!” No.
What is more surprising than the ignorance and stupidity of the police is the lack of understanding – sometimes it seems like mocking – that David Green, the head of the murder and the biggest criminals, Scotland 2019-23 seems to show to the woman who gave them the crime on a plate. “I could run miles,” he sniffs, referring to Sandy’s return without any other protection. And they stand by the decision not to provide that protection. The relationship was short-lived, he explains – and he was “a very intelligent, knowledgeable doctor”. I didn’t know the Hippocratic oath protected you from the wrath of a murderous friend, but I bow to Mr Green knowing better. There’s also random defense lawyer Brian McConnachie KC who seems to think less of him for taking a break. “All the situations where he didn’t do things in a way that people would expect him to do, I think, I feel sorry for him.”
We should also mention the actual nature of the crime: “The list of ways misogynists have set this country up to hurt, humiliate and destroy us” – but I know that probably won’t happen. Other ways to get a postcard to a custom address, please. Meanwhile – Caroline, you are amazing.
