Physical Address
304 North Cardinal St.
Dorchester Center, MA 02124
Saturday Night Live returns to the finale of its 51st season with a press conference held by “the man, the legend, the role” Secretary of War Pete Hegseth (Colin Jost). He angrily “dogwalks” the dweeby members of the press pool on questions about his mistake about Pulp Fiction the wording of the real Bible verse, the real cost of the war with Iran, and the number of American bases that were hit (“More bases than you started to hit, virgin”), before turning the talking point to “almosttel Anzishtel FBI”, “Almosttel” fire director of Almosttel.
A wide-eyed Patel gives a no-nonsense update on his latest attempt to assassinate Trump (“Another one!”) before bragging that he’s “a trailblazer: the first Indian to absorb their work.” He rejects claims of his alcoholism – even before Hegseth jumps in, assuming the question is directed at him – to make it clear that he has never been “drunk or drunk on the job”, nor has he “used taxpayer dollars to get a private jet to fly him and his girlfriend to three different Buffalo Wild Wings locations if they were to tell the world to see.”
Ansari is too good to play Patel complaining about another celebrity taking a juicy role from a reality show (not that they have anyone to play him yet). The (alleged) over-indulgence going on in Trump’s cabinet could have made for a few jokes here, but the show paid attention.
The same goes for the White House Correspondent’s Dinner, which you’d think would make this open meat. Also, considering how gung-ho Trump has been in harassing his FCC colleagues for anyone who mocks him — including Jimmy Kimmel, whose joke about Melania Trump being a widow had nothing to do with the incident — it’s not hard to see why SNL often gets a good laugh.
Olivia Rodrigo, doing two jobs tonight, takes the stage for her monologue. Although she has been a guest singer and appeared in dramas before, this shows that she started as a host. Taking the familiar path of young actors who have become famous, Rodrigo looks back on his childhood career, selling old Navy commercials that appeared a lot and reminiscing about the time he spent on the Disney Channel with Jake Paul (“He might say, one day I really want to beat the old guys on Netflix”). It’s just filler to get you to the monologue section, where he makes a new version of his Driver’s License, this time about the endless experience of getting a Real ID from the DMV.
Edge of Destiny is an 80s soap opera. Rodrigo and Chloe Fineman play rivals for the heart of one of their sons. Their fight turns deadly when Rodrigo’s form hits Fineman, causing him to fall down the steps of his seemingly endless home. The same thing happens to Rodrigo’s friend, the family lawyer, the waiter, another family, a small dog, and finally Rodrigo himself. The central sight gag revolves around a painting floating on the floor as the crew moves around. It’s not funny at all, but the live version is incredibly disturbing.
Next up is a new short by Dan Bulla. It’s a music video from Rodrigo that begins as a way to his bedroom before things take a turn when he reveals “the only problem is, I’m in the zoo of the world.” As in the past, laughs are rare – even a shirtless James Austin Johnson refuses to laugh – but the results and animation are solid.
At the TV Shop, the southern audience (Mikey Day, Ashley Padilla) welcomes Rodrigo’s baker, stealing his famous lava cake with recycled tins. Unfortunately, the cake resembles an anus, or “fudge hole”, as they call it. Things take a turn for the worse once Day’s character sticks his finger in the hole to get some peanut butter inside. It’s been a steamy moment since one of these sketches has appeared on the show — last time, Day was paired with Heidi Gardner — and this one raises the bar with its iconic gag.
At a friend’s birthday party, Rodrigo’s new guest asks his tablemate (Tommy Brennan) to pretend to be his boyfriend when he meets his ex (Ben Marshall). His ex-wife tries the same trick with her tablemate (Padilla), an old, crazy woman who is way, way too hard on lies. Finally he smeared potatoes on his face and body, tore his clothes, and shouted, “We have to get married, midnight! Another good performance of Padilla’s comedy.”
Debbie Harry shows up to introduce Rodrigo to his first performance of the night. Unfortunately, Rodrigo’s fans in the audience do not seem to know that they are in the presence of singers, because Harry’s mysterious appearance meets zero.
On Weekend, Michael Che introduces you to the first guests, critics / bloggers / podcasters Alix Earle (Veronika Slowikowska) and Alex Cooper (Fineman). A pair of blonde dingbats – physically and verbally unrecognizable – break down their messy beef in a cryptic “gay voice” before summing up “worse than 9/11”. This show seems to expect most of its audience (including yours truly) to have no idea who these people are.
Later, Che brings members Kam Patterson to the desk to discuss the recent split between rapper Megan Thee Stallion and NBA player Klay Thompson. Patterson says he’s upset about the split, but his mile-long smile tells a different story. Finally, he admits the truth, declaring, “Who can deceive Meg Thee Stallion? Who is even this person… As Patterson himself admits at the time, he is rarely used in the show, but he is finding his voice and a new look.
Next, Rodrigo plays a woman who is caught sneaking home after a night out with her suspicious boyfriend (Marcello Hernández). They move on to a rendition of the 2003 Isley Brothers soap opera R&B single Busted. They are constantly joined by a growing cast of characters, including a strange-looking dog, a bandit, a bandit’s wife, a bandit master, and their angry landlord. Dated and not as silly as the fiction.
Rodrigo performs his second set, this time introduced by actor and recent host Connor Storrie. The crowd boos him, unlike Harry (who is shy). Next, Rodrigo and Slowikowska play two friends taking an Uber to a club. They happily ask their chief driver (Andrew Dismukes) to play music. He happily agrees, before belting out a song followed by – in heavy patois – a Jamaican dance. Suddenly the atmosphere changes, and no one knows what to do. Finally the driver accepts what will happen to him: “I just realized that I am one of the most talented Rasta MCs in the world… I can’t escape my destiny.” Probably the best Dismukes to ever be on the show.
The article concludes with an ad for Safeguard, “the first home security solution designed to create crime-proof images that can go viral.” When the alarm goes off, Safeguard sends Tik Tokers into the scene to ask hot-button questions like “Boy or girl?” and “the craziest place you’ve ever had your back blown off?” Including hard digs at new stationary stations and interest in people like Barstool Sports (the second show of the episode), Subway Takes, Chicken Day, social media comedian Corey Booker, and many influencers: “I couldn’t believe how fast Tik Toker got there.
A solid round, all things considered. Rodrigo made a decent save, but the night was lifted by a couple of brilliant shots, as well as steals from Dismukes and Padilla, far and away the season’s MVP. Watch a minute from this one to upload to the best list of the end of the season.
